Thanksgiving? Christmas? You mean those aren't about shopping and presents and selfishness?

Sigh.

Sometimes, it is the littlest things that set me off. Like today, for example, my best friend texted me: "oh my gosh walmart is open all day tomorrow. that is so wrong."

Yes. You're darn right it's wrong. What is up with the world we live in? I know I'm by no means perfect or guilt-free in this - but why are we all so selfish? It's thanksgiving! Do we even remember what the purpose of this holiday is?

No, it is not to eat a ton of food and watch football. No, it is not to go out and get all the ads for the day after (which i admit, i have indeed been guilty of). It's not about shopping. It's about family. And more important than that, it's about being thankful.

How can we claim to be so thankful for all that we have, only to start thinking about all the things we want and think we need as soon as dinner is over? We're such hypocrites!

Don't get me wrong, it's awesome to give someone a gift. The look on their face... just the sheer joy of gift-giving... it's incredible. But when the quest to get that gift becomes more about competition and/or simply getting the hottest deal, that's where we go wrong. Every year people die. They die! On Black Friday. They get stomped in a herd of people trying to run through the store. They get in fights over who got to the that toy first. They drive like maniacs and get in wrecks on the way to another store. It's just crazy. Why are we so greedy?

I mean, is it really so necessary to get tickle-me freakin elmo at 3am the day after Thanksgiving? Really?

There is nothing wrong with wanting to give someone a nice gift. Nothing. But if you have to take time away from that person or your family to go out at a ridiculous hour in the morning just to get it, I'm quite certain they'd just as much enjoy the time you could've spent with them than the actual gift itself. Sometimes the greatest gift is time. And what many people don't realize, is that it's not only their families that are losing out on time with a loved one. Every single employee that's forced to work at a ridiculous hour on Black Friday or even on Thanksgiving is taking time away from their families, just so you have the opportunity to get this season's hottest deals.

Honestly... it just makes me so mad. I'm not saying i'm never guilty of greed or selfishness... but. I don't ever want to get so caught up in the shopping (which i don't really like shopping anyway) that I forget the real meaning of the holidays. It's family. Even more so - it's JESUS.

Yeah, God, the same God who created the entire universe and loves you more than you could ever comprehend, sent His son down to this painful earth so that we would not have to be punished for our sins. That's what Christmas is all about. It's celebrating that our Savior came down to this earth in human-form to rescue us from certain eternal death. We can be thankful for this on Christmas. We can be thankful for this on Thanksgiving. We can be thankful for this every day out of the year.

But we have specific holidays when the entire purpose is to celebrate this fact and be thankful, and what do we do instead? We fight with each other. We go shopping. We stuff out faces with turkey. We say we're thankful, but are we really?

Let me ask you something. If you died tomorrow, would you have rather spent time with the people you love, or gone out and fought people for the cheapest deal for a gift for those same people? Be honest. The gifts not gonna matter too long from now.

Time is a much greater gift than anything you could ever buy at the store.

And you know what, I think that's what God is trying to tell us too. He doesn't want us to spend all our money on all kinds of Christian t-shirts and bumper stickers and all that. There's nothing wrong with that. But what God really wants from us is time. We should spend time with God. Every day we ought to be talking to Him and thanking Him for our very life and the fact that through Him we are saved from hell.

This has been kind of a ridiculous and angry rant. Could I have said some things nicer? Certainly. I just want people to see... there's a God out there who loves you more than you will ever know. Why don't you start paying attention to Him?

so, that didn't last a week. Just being honest.

Priority Shift

Okay! So here it is.

Yesterday, I officially began a break from facebook. Yes, you read that right. No, the world is not ending.

I got to thinking that many of my interactions on facebook as of late have not cultivated feelings of "love" and "encouragement". It has mostly been a way for me to waste time - anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours. Yes, it ashames me to admit that, but yes. I can indeed spend hours at a time on the social networking giant known as Facebook.

There are so many better things I could do with my time than sit indoors and stare at a computer screen and cultivate my virtual "social life". I can walk my dog. I can ride my bike. Go to the pool. Hang out with my friends. Get a haircut. Write a book. The list goes on and on. All these are wonderful, semi-productive things, but not the main point of my break from the online social networking world.

For one, I am a texter. I love to text. Unless you happen to be my best friend or my employer, you can pretty much bank on leaving me a voicemail because I won't answer the phone. Text me! That's ridiculous. I'm majoring in public relations, for crying out loud. I've got to work on my people skills. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not a hermit, and I am capable of having comfortable social interactions. But given the choice, I'd much rather hang with my small, but close circle of friends than go out to a big party or something and meet new people. Maybe party is the wrong word. I've never been a fan of parties. Perhaps "event" works better. Taking a break will allow me the opportunity and challenge of actually speaking with people in person and/or on the phone. Woah! Hah.

But let's not get off track here. The things I have mentioned before are all fringe benefits. Benefits, no less, but not my main goal.

The absolute main reason I am attempting this is because I want to spend more time with God. How wrong is it that I can honestly say that for as long as I can remember, I have spent more time on facebook than I have reading my Bible? That's absolutely ridiculous. There's no excuse for that. None. Why should I have to be down and depressed to come to God in prayer or read my Bible? I DON'T!!!! Sadly, this is when the majority of my praying and Bible reading comes in. Whether it's for myself or for a friend, I come to God mostly when help is needed. It shouldn't be that way. God should be someone I can and do come talk to everyday, with everything. I should spend time with Him just as I spend time with my family and friends. He loves me more than I could ever imagine, and what do I give him in return? A few measly minutes here and there and Sunday mornings and Tuesday nights. That is not enough. And that is what I wish to change. I hope that with this endeavor I can take the time I could have spent on facebook and use it to read my Bible, or to pray, or just to simply spend time with God in worship.



Now don't get me wrong, facebook is a great way to communicate, and it is a great way to encourage others and be encouraged. I am not staying off facebook forever. This last week before school starts back up I am taking a complete break. Then after that, we'll see what happens. I hope to not go right back to my old habits of wasting time online and ignoring God. Please reprimand me if I do. But I do intend to use it as a means of encouraging others and sharing what is going on in my life and other's lives. Facebook is not a bad thing. But like anything, when used in excess, is indeed a sin.


I challenge you to take a look at your own life and see how much time you spend with God. However much that is, I'm sure it can be more.

flat broke

So, I knew it would eventually happen.

It had to.

While working at Edward Jones my senior year of high school, I managed to save up enough money to live on for the past two years I've been in college. I worked a few jobs in between then and now... while at HLG up in Hannibal, I worked in the admissions office. and I worked a two week stint at a crappy doggie day care place back home. But for the most part, I've had my job making bulletins at my grandma's church ($75 a month) and the money I saved from Edward Jones to fall back on all this time.

Well, that fund is now finally gone. For the first time in my life, I have less money in my bank account than what I owe on my credit card bill. I've always paid it off. Now I am officially going into debt (well, save for the whole... thousands upon thousands of dollars that I was already in debt for to pay for college).

I do not have enough money to fill up my gas tank. It is on empty.

I borrowed my parents car to drive to church this morning (because I was running late)... but it also has less than 1/8 of a tank so that won't last too long.

I am officially out of money. I am in dire need of a job.

Saw an ad in the paper for a hiring fair at Aldi. The starting pay for cashiers/stockers is $13 an hour. What? Really? Yes. All you have to do is pick up an application and fill it out and bring it to the fair. (and talk yourself up, of course, but as we've already established..i'm pretty good at that.) So I went up to the store closest to me and they were out of applications... bahh...

Not getting discouraged, I headed out to Saint Charles on an Aldi application search. Alas, I finally have one in my possession, and am about to fill it out.

So tomorrow morning, bright and early, I will be heading to the hiring fair in hopes of finding a job with Aldi. That will probably use the rest of the gas I have left... so I won't be able to make any unnecessary (or really, necessary) trips after that. However, that doesn't mean I still can't walk to the pool. ;)

Here's hoping I get hired at Aldi... or you're looking at the next fry cook at McDonald's.

A friend of mine sent me the lyrics to this song in reference to my current situation, and I happen to really like the song and found it encouraging, so I'm going to post them.


God Will Make a Way

God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength
For each new day
He will make a way
He will make a way

By a roadway in the wilderness
He'll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
He will do something new today

Career Decisions

At one time or another in every person's life, there comes a time when they must face the question: What on earth do I want to do with the rest of my life? If you're incredibly blessed, the answer is plain to you. You've known what you wanted to do since you can remember. My brother was fortunate in this way. Growing up on an air force base, he always knew that he wanted to be a pilot. And he accomplished that dream, and is now both an aircraft mechanic and pilot. That is awesome.

But what if the answer is not so clear-cut for you?

This is the case for me. I've never really had a dream, career-wise. Sure, when I was younger, I can remember wanting to be an astronaut, a pilot, the first female NFL football player... things like that. But there was never one thing that I stuck to, that I knew I wanted to work towards.

In high school, I thought I wanted to be a teacher, like my aunt. I was an assistant in her classroom, and really enjoyed being a good influence to the kids and helping them out. But I soon learned that's the only thing I was good at, as far as teaching goes. I'm not what you would call assertive, and therefore have trouble gaining control of a classroom. If you don't have control as a teacher, you really have nothing.

When I started college, I started off in Mass Communications. I love working with cameras and things like that, so I thought it would be a good fit. I worked with the newspaper, worked at the campus tv station. Absolutely loved it. But when I realized just how competitive the job market for mass comm graduates was, I thought it might be best to switch to a safer degree.

I believed I wanted to work with computers, because I'm always toying around with mine, and have a pretty wide knowledge base of all things technical. But I soon found out that while I enjoy using computers, the actual making them work part of it I cannot stand.

So now... here I am, back to square one. I had a little run in with a glass door in a pool, and had to get my face X-rayed to make sure my nose wasn't broken. As this was going on, I was watching the X-ray tech and thinking, "Hey, I could do that." So I began to look into radiology. I got pretty excited. Found out it's usually a two-year program, and I would get to still work with computers, but more hands on, and also with lots of technical machinery. Awesome!

I was incredibly excited because I thought I finally found what I wanted to do with my life. Well, I went to the only accredited school in my city, and found out there is a two year plus waiting list. TWO YEARS?!?! .... well. that kind of burst my bubble.

And here I am today. What on earth am I supposed to do? My best friend tells me I should go into PR (public relations) because I'm good at writing and promoting myself (job-wise), so she thinks that would be a good fit. I have to agree, I do enjoy writing. But I am not what you would call an extrovert by any means. A lot of stuff I see on public relations says that the ideal candidate is very out-going, that sort of thing. I don't know if that is necessarily true, because what if I just want to go into it on the writing side? Not all PR jobs involve interacting with the media and the general public. Surely not.

I did a little research, and found out that with my previous mass comm classes, I can still graduate on time in two more years if I get a mass comm degree with an emphasis in public relations. That's pretty cool. And no more business classes. THAT is wonderful. I hate business. I never understood why I had to take so many business classes with computers.

So I got online and looked at the registration for next semester. And while the majority of classes are full because my school is kind of terrible at being organized and helpful to students, I did manage to find three I could switch out my computer classes for.

So as of right now, I have a tentative plan in place.

I understand it may not be what I end up doing when I graduate. But the main thing is: I graduate.